Scribble Something

{6th August 2014}
I haven't been writing much lately. I don't think it was writer's block, I think it was just me being too lazy to think about something to write. I doubt that I will ever write a book, I just don't have the discipline, a collection of poems maybe. After at least a year of no new material, I finally wrote a poem. Like most of my poems, it comes off as more of a song, which like most of my poems, it is. I used to compile all my writing (especially my poems) in this notebook.

Poetic Musings, by Rachel Wong Yen Yi.

But at one point I was writing a lot, almost two poems everyday, so I couldn't be bothered to update it, so now I just type them out and save them online. Which is easier, and dare I say it, better.

And so my wait begins

Today was my SPM (Malaysian O-levels) trial English writing exam. We have to write 2 essays, one directed, the other continuous.There are 5 topics to choose for the continuous writing question.
I chose: Write a story ending with, "All good things come to those who wait."

I wrote a love story. I have been reading a lot of shoujo manga lately and I watch Legend of Korra so the elements and many of the little moments are undoubtedly stolen from there, so it is in no way original. Unfortunately, I will not be able to share it until the paper is returned. Here's the first paragraph as a "preview":

     It is almost dusk, I am waiting for her at the corner of the street. She has just landed in the country and she sent me a message asking me to wait here for her, the place where we last saw each other. It is cold, I wrap myself tightly in the scarf she gave me before she left, it still smells faintly of her perfume. I lean against the lamp post, tilting my head upwards to watch the sun say its final farewells. I close my eyes, and the memories begin to flow.

There was something else I wanted to post but I lost the notebook I wrote it in. *sobs*

Update: (11th September 2014)
I got back the paper.
I got full marks.

A Melodious Symphony

I am so glad I was wrong.

Here's the program.

The time was short and long at the same time.

Unexpectedly, a lot of people turned up, so many that there weren't enough chairs! It was a great surprise because on Monday, less than 400 tickets were sold; Wednesday: 530+; Friday: 750+; and on Sunday itself, at least 1000. Almost everyone from my class turned up, they all sat in one row. They cheered for the band girls. I am very thankful that all my friends turned up.

I guess my conducting was slightly better. I was satisfied with my playing. Everyone played very well. There was finally percussion for Love Story meets Viva La Vida, and it was good. Apparently Frozen was quite good, I had fun, the only thing wrong with it was the PA system which totally sucked. It appears that our Pomp & Circumstance was better than the other school's. Everyone started clapping before the end of that, Instant Concert, and Can-Can. Unwisely, we did not prepare for an encore. So when the audience roared for one, I told Kam Yan to do Can-Can again.

The band girls kept speeding up the tempo for Can-Can, which we strings found hilarious because they were basically making life difficult for themselves. In the end we laughed together, with the strings laughing at the band, and the band laughing at us laughing. :D

It was amazing. All of us are so proud. The cheers and screams from the crowd were everything. We were so proud and high after that. Everyone wished we could do it all over again. Working so hard and putting everything all out there for the whole world to see was scary but liberating. Thank you all for this. <3

Get in line. For once, I was the one getting her picture taken. It's a very small, very vain thing, but it mattered to me. I got two bouquet of flowers, one from my mom, the other from the emcees.

My only regret: forgetting to take a photo with my lover/cellist, Xin Ying, who played the part of Hans for Love Is An Open Door while I played Anna's part. T_T But having only one regret is miles better than having a dozen. I am very thankful for that.

More photos here.

{7th to 8th July: Monday - Tuesday} Aftermath on Facebook and Instagram.
{9th July: Wednesday} An article about our concert popped up in the state section of the national Chinese newspaper.
{11th July: Friday} AJK meeting to decide on next year's committee.
{12th July: Saturday} AGM.
{14th July: Monday} Our last day at Symphony.

Reflections
The beginning
The finale
National Music Camp @ Langkawi Island (June 2013)
International Music Festival @ Genting Highlands (November 2013)
National Music Camp @ Penang Island (December 2013)
National Competition @ Penang Island (March 2013)

The end of this concert also means the end of my time with the AMC Symphony Orchestra. I know I should be sad, but instead I'm really happy. Thanks to this concert, I now know that I can win at life sometimes. Thanks to this concert, I have absolutely no regrets about the biggest and most constant part of my secondary school life. This is the end of the line, but also the beginning of a new one. I started this whole journey on a low note, and the last week was a whirlwind of emotions, mostly negative. I am glad and grateful that it ended on such a high note. I am happy that I can still smile at the end of an era.

Thank you. It was truly A Melodious Symphony.

Burning Red

{11th June ~ 8:50 - 10:10}
THE TAYLOR SWIFT CONCERT IS OVER. *CRIES* WHYYYYYYYYYY????!!!!!
Ok firstly: It ended too quickly, and she didn't sing enough songs from Red.
BUT ANYWAY, THE GOOD THINGS.

This was my very first concert, and I totally loved the experience.
My brother and I went early to check out the place and buy merchandise before the crowds arrived. There were already people waiting in line, it was 2PM. I bought a shirt, a baton, and a guitar pick set.
Then after waiting around at our hotel, we came back and it was SHOWTIME.
People who walked right in front of me: The 2nd Asia's Next Top Model, and Taylor Swift's mom.

Incredibly Unmotivated

I am barely halfway through my mid-year exams. I honestly haven't studied much (read: at all) and for some reason, I don't care. Not one bit. Instead, I've been sailing through the afternoons, weekends and holidays with zero regard of the time I've wasted. I don't know what's wrong with me at the moment. I have forgotten to bring my calculator twice already. I have reasons to be afraid, of all the subjects I'm certain to fail, of the consequences once the results are released. But I'm not. For the moment, I could care less.

Instead of thinking about the now, I'm thinking about the future.
And oh, what a very selective future it is.

I've fast-forward to Taylor Swift's concert in June, which my brother and I will be attending. I'm constantly thinking about the symphony orchestra concert in July. And most of all, I keep thinking about what I'm going to do after I finish secondary school (i.e. high school).

Previously, I entertained the thought of going to Singapore to Study. To do the IB diploma in Wen Yi's school (UWCSEA) and then do BA (Hons) Film at LASALLE College of the Arts.
Yup, I've decided that I want to work in the film industry, a field infamous for its high unemployment rates, even among the arts scene.

However, after doing a lot of research, I realised that a film degree doesn't guarantee a job in the film industry. Which is why I've decided to study communications, which can help me find work in the industry, but also give me something to fall back on if it doesn't work out. And maybe doing an MA or MFA in filmmaking, most likely in the US since TischAsia no longer exists. Sigh.

My father is recommending the University of Nottingham for BA (Hons) International Communication Studies with Film and Television Studies because he thinks highly of the university and think I will enjoy studying it. However, I'm more interested in UCSI University's BA (Hons) Mass Communication, because it will allow me to major in Film and Television in the final year and I will definitely be able to make actual short films, unlike the former option.

Mr Lee (my violin teacher) is a lecturer there so maybe he can give me some valuable insight of the environment and the quality there. I don't think a music degree will be good for me, but I definitely want to get my diploma in violin and start learning the piano again, so that I have something else to fall back on. Yup, music is my ultimate back-up plan.

But anyway, I have no idea how I'm going to climb out of this rut I've stuck myself in. Any advice for now and for my future is extremely welcome.

Also, it is very likely that I will end up rewatching Her and Moonrise Kingdom later, instead of studying for whatever subject I'm taking tomorrow. *Sigh*

Here are the things I've done so far instead of studying:

• Blog about not studying.
• Watch TV shows with the pretext of admiring the actual production as a form of studying for the future.
• Play 2048, repeatedly. (Side note: I won.)
• Play the same songs on the piano over and over again.
• Play the same song on the violin over and over again.
• Practise The Moon Song on the ukulele.
• Tidy my desk.
• Begin tidying the rest of my room.
• Research for the future.
• Plan for the concert.
• Tumblr.
• Scroll down Twitter and constantly unfollow and follow users.
• Basically everything except study.

Many Happy Returns

I am happy and sad and everything in between. My birthday was on the 26th, during the mid-term school holidays. I still had to go to school because our Symphony Orchestra was going for a competition in Penang the very next day. I'm the concertmistress of Team A (playing the Prince of Egypt) and the conductor of Team B (playing Pocahontas). I spent most of rehearsal time with Team B. That morning, I was in the classroom with them, about to begin practice when suddenly, everyone from Team A came in.

At first, I thought they wanted to listen to Team B's performance, and asked them as much. Then, my good friends Kam and Shum walked in with a birthday cake and they all started singing the birthday song. I was really surprised and also really pleased. It's the first time ever someone surprised me that way. Then I blew out the candles and Kam cut the cake (her b'day: 28/3). We made the cake a mess but had fun smearing the cream on each other's faces. The cake was a mocha sponge cake. After that, it was business as usual.

Here is my Tumblr post complete with photos.

After rehearsal, So Jun came to pick me up to take me out. She was a little late, but never mind. After we dropped her friend off, I got out to get in the front seat. She had dropped my present beside the door (by accident) so when I opened it, she asked me if I could pick up something she dropped from beside my seat. And that's how I got my present. Easily the best birthday present EVER. I don't deserve it, but she says I do. Either way, I was really touched, especially by the little note she wrote for me. We went to Jusco, had Secret Recipe for lunch and she bought me these really cute charms. I skipped violin that day. (Shhh!!!)

For dinner, Dad bought crab and we watched The Avengers. Dad's birthday presents were tickets to Taylor Swift's concert in June and the lomography camera (but apparently, that's my pay for doing his website). Also, he bought me scallop pasta from Indulgence for lunch earlier.

The next day was the 27TH and THE DAY OF OUR COMPETITION. I was nervous the whole day for Team B, in the end they got bronze, as expected after their performance. Oh yeah, apparently my partner from the Genting friendship concert shares the same birthday as me. ANYWAY. THEN IT WAS TEAM A'S TURN. AND MY GOD WE WERE GOOD. All smiles after we left the hall. But during the presentation ceremony, we got... silver. I've never felt so deflated in my life. WE DESERVED GOLD. And it's not just me, some other schools also mentioned that we should have gotten gold. Heck, even the school that goes out of their way to say how much we suck said we should have gotten gold.

On the bus, I listened to the audio our senior (Mei Ern) recorded. I CRIED. IT WAS PERFECT. REGARDLESS OF THE RESULTS, I AM PROUD OF US AND THE FIVE YEARS WE DEVOTED TO THIS ORCHESTRA. NO REGRETS.

Also had a long talk with Mei Ern and Kam and we went to this totally useless shopping centre which totally killed our mood completely. But later we sang and stuff so we were pretty high by the time we arrived back in school. Also got a Doraemon from my junior.

28th: Kam's birthday present from me was a message attached with a collage. I had to go to school to do oral, my cinematography is good. Then Junqi took me out to AEON, had lunch at Nando's, watched Captain America, took the worst photo in history.

30th: Watched Divergent with Carmen and Cassandra. Did those Kawaii photo thingies. Had lunch after at Sakae Sushi.

It was a jolly holiday indeed.

31st March + 1st April: I received birthday cards from my three Mouseketeers. Oh yeah, even our coach thought we were gonna get gold, he was shocked when I asked him why we didn't.

The Sea of He And She, a tragic romance

{4th July 2012}
Junqi wanted to write a poem together so this is what happened, and I sent it to the school magazine for last year. According to her, I shouldn't have added her name to the credit, because I wrote most of it, but she did help, and it was her idea. So... I think most of our schoolmates liked it, even though it's a bit melancholy. There are a few mistakes, but I still like it.

This is the story of he and she,

They lived in a village by the sea.

The villagers said it was destiny,

But it turned out it was not meant to be.

He the sailor,

She the fisherman's daughter.

The first day of summer,

The first day they saw each other.

She was known as a great beauty.

Each day, she would swim in the great blue sea.

One day, as he stood on deck drinking tea,

He dropped his cup, mesmerized by her beauty.

By the end of the season, they were wed.

They had great pleasures while in bed.

You may think they were happy but this is sad,

This happy tale is about to end bad.

Each morning, she still went swimming.

Her beauty still blossomed even with her aging.

She became so beautiful till one day,

Even the sea couldn't turn away.

That evening, she did not return.

The cause of her disappearance, he vowed to learn.

As the night went on he began to despair.

He ran towards the sea, hoping to find her there.

He walked along the shore, desperate to find a trace.

Instead the sea washed up her ring, he began to pace.

Up and down the beach he went,

His frustrations, he began to vent.

Close to dawn, a conclusion came to my mind.

The mere thought brought tears to his eyes.

He realized that the sea had finally claimed her as its own.

Struck by the horror, he began to moan.

He looked out into the sea and thought,

A life without her, worth living? Not.

And so he walked into the sea,

Hoping that he would find his she.

Nothing was heard of them since then,

And at last our tragic tale has come to an end.